BDSM servitude

I know I've talked about service in BDSM on this blog. As I said yesterday- when I was bratting- service is one of my favorite things. When I write The Queen and his slaves in Vala's Story at the coffeehouse Night, their serves are often based on considerable personal experience. Okay so you have your points, not necessarily prioritized, to go on with- yes, I'm almost ordered today :D. What I wouldn't give for a "Simon" to help me, as I joked yesterday. :D


Online pages, groups
In trying to recommend pages about BDSM service that called me to laugh out loud, say "This page seems to think there's 'one twue way' to practice BDSM" and then I closed the page without going further :D. Sadly there was less (that I could find) than I expected there would be when I wrote "online research needed on BDSM groups/pages needed" when I was working offline on this article.


So I looked around to see what I could find. First off is an interesting summary about BDSM servitude on Wikipedia- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Servitude_(BDSM) . Some of it gave me the giggles, but really it is only meant to be an overview.


I highly appreciated what this short article had to say about service: http://madisonkink.com/definitions-in-bdsm-service/ Especially how the author talked about the multiplicity of roles within BDSM. One particular quote I enjoyed: "Service, in the form of a domestic, is time and energy for cleaning and such, but is also where a dominant gives complete trust to the person to do what is asked, and lets the service person take control." Because yes, my Master doesn't stand over me as I accomplish various cleaning things, hence the next point of "helps."


Finally because Fetlife is the only BDSM community (off Facebook and the limits of what we can talk about there without getting banned etc), I wanted to give you the link to the service oriented group I'm in on there. Of course, my involvement is spotty- like when I'm more engaged in service around the house, I'm less involved in the group :D. You may need a FL account just to view the group, but here is the link: https://fetlife.com/groups/1700 . This is the group mentioned in the "helps" section, where yes, we kinksters have talked about Flylady at times :D.


Helps
I'm sad to admit, I'm about to go into a "My mother..." story here. My mother's 1st husband was an abusive alcoholic for whom she was a perfect homemaker- my summary of "family lore" on the subject. By the time she got to marriage to my dad & my childhood. she'd learned how to have a house the looked like a magazine photo without seeming to do any work- probably in part because I was pretty stationary, reading or playing with my My Little Ponies. So as a young wife and mother, I started to teach myself the skills she never taught me. Even though there is still the rare cleaning I don't know, for me it's more about the failure to time budget. I love the Flylady system and when Master says I can (based on budget) use it, "Saving Dinner" menu planning (although I admit to currently avoiding some of her materials like her podcasts because she's on a "paleo diet" kick, which I just find irritating). In fact, I'm just about to start re-reading "Sink Reflections" (by Maria Cilley, the "Flylady") again; I've read it many times over the years since my Master collared me. She has a whole system, books, tools, etc so I'll leave her to explain that on her page, if you're interested. Many Flylady forums are rather conservative Christian, but I've found her even being talked about in BDSM service oriented groups (like the one on Fetlife that I belong to).


Types of service that I don't get
I've seen sexual service mentioned, but from my relationship based POV, I don't get it. Unfortunately again, going on Google to search the term "sexual service" didn't net me much. Shrugs, maybe it's a way of saying "prostitution" that has less baggage? Now I know I've seen the term on BDSM pages, but fuck if I can find it now. ugh. One thing I did find- sexual service and domestic service are both things you can easily search for and find in "BDSM want ads." LOL Equally unfamiliar in practice to me is service only (no sexual interaction) BDSM service situations. When I've seen ads about then, it reads to me as a "maid with fetish terms used." However the FL group I gave you the link to has more information on non-sexual service, if that's what you're interested in.



If you're a submissive (or whatever "bottom" role you prefer) serving your dominant (or whatever role He/She/Ze prefers), remember most important is to serve as the dominant wants, as you both agreed to, not according to some page's, book's, or other person's explanation of what service is.