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...profanity, sexually explicit dialog andadult imagery.
If you are under 18 and/or offended by this...

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Thursday, April 4, 2013

Domestic Discipline (DD) and Love by Patricia Green

Before I get into the meat of this article, I'd like to thank Joelle for having me here today. It's always a pleasure to meet new people. Hello, everyone!

Domestic Discipline (DD) generally refers to a D/s relationship that focuses on one head of household (the dominant party) and one submissive partner. It rarely gets into bondage or sadomasochism, unlike BDSM, but does involve corporal punishment. That corporal punishment is primarily spanking, but there are less physically trying punishments, including "corner time" and "writing lines." It's important to note that this corporal punishment is not about harming anyone. The spanking is on the buttocks only. It's an intimate relationship because it's about two people who care about one another. So, now we're on the same page with regard to DD.

Let's talk about love. Yes, that's a huge topic, but one I've been known to get into quite often in my books and short stories. Like politics and religion, everyone has an opinion and plenty are conflicting. What is love, anyway? Is it intimacy? Is it sex? Is it a necessary element in a lasting power exchange?

I think it's safe to say that love is an intimate emotion. Even a person's love for her best friend is intimate because it is between two people that coexist within a framework of acceptance. A person's love for his/her spouse is perhaps even more intimate because they share so many things, from morning coffee to vacuuming the house, to sex, it's coexisting on a very personal plane. Do these people love each other? Almost certainly, whether they choose to label it that way or not. So maybe we understand a little bit about love.

Is DD about love, too? I'm going to say yes. With a little experience talking to folks who live a DD lifestyle and some direct experience in my 20 year DD relationship, it's easy to see that this is an adult relationship where people care about each other deeply or are falling in love. Why would a head of household (usually the husband) decide to spank his wife if he wasn't trying to teach her to be a better person both inside and outside of their marriage? The boyfriend or husband might want to teach her to control her temper when dealing with difficult situations, or perhaps they have a less personal goal of teaching her to get to work on time. At first, they might argue about these things. He'll have one viewpoint and she'll have another. It might lead to tears, or ugly words exchanged. They love each other, but things are falling apart. Then maybe she'll hear about DD from a friend, coworker, pastor, and she realizes that their goals can be met and harmony can be attained. Would she feel this way if she didn't love her husband, her marriage, the basics of her life? No. This can be applied to many different kinds of adult relationships, from best friends through adult parent/adult child.

Imposed discipline at the seat of the pants can come directly from the head of household if he's already familiar with it. And, so long as he's in control of his own emotions, the DD relationship can flourish and enrich their lives together. However, above all, the foundation has to be a shared hope for cohesiveness.
DD is based on love. It is the melding of two people's goals and aspirations for their relationship together. It's about harmony, and what is more harmonious than two voices working together to create a more salubrious whole?

For some reading involving DD in a romantic setting, I'd like to steer you toward my books. In particular, one of my more recent books, Bourbon & Branch Water.

Fledgling attorney, Stormy Stillwater, wants to make a name for herself with her first case, a dispute over water rights and a bourbon distillery. Unfortunately, the opposing attorney is the guy she met at her brother’s wedding and with whom she had her first one night stand. She’s incredibly embarrassed and yet remains super-attracted to Jeff. Even though she’s certain he’s a playboy, she falls into bed with him all too easily.

Jeff Hand, successful Las Vegas attorney, is taken with Stormy at the outset and tries to show her. He can’t keep his hands off her, nor she him, and it seems like they’re in bed every other minute. Jeff sees how special Stormy is beyond the bedroom but he can’t quite understand why she has such cold feet where he’s concerned.

From their initial wild night together through the nascence of their relationship, Stormy and Jeff learn how spankings can be sexy and yet mighty effective at curbing unwanted behavior. But will Jeff be able to convince Stormy to take a chance on love?

Bourbon & Branch Water is available at:
Blushing Books, http://www.blushingbooks.com/index.php?l=product_detail&p=2231
Amazon US, http://www.amazon.com/Bourbon-Branch-Water-ebook/dp/B00APPCNZK/ref=sr_1_1
Amazon UK, http://www.amazon.co.uk/Bourbon-Branch-Water-ebook/dp/B00APPCNZK/ref=sr_1_1
You can contact Patricia Green in the following ways:
Email: pig@patriciagreenbooks.com
Website/Blog: http://www.patriciagreenbooks.com
Spanking romance pages: http://patriciagreenbooks.com/books-featuring-spanking/
Facebook http://www.facebook.com/Patricia.Green.Romance
Twitter: @PatriciaIGreen
Google+: http://gplus.to/PatriciaGreen
Amazon Author Page: http://www.amazon.com/Patricia-Green/e/B002RCB0IK/ref=ntt_athr_dp_pel_1
Goodreads Author Page: http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4541511.Patricia_Green


  1. Looks great! Will be adding these to my TBR list. :)


    erzabetwrites(at) gmail dot com

    1. I need to do that as well, it does look good :) thanks for stopping by and reading Patricia's thoughts

    2. Thanks, Erzabet! I appreciate your positive comment. Enjoy the book. :)

  2. Hello Trish,
    Lovely article! I am often impressed by your writing but today I was impressed that you used the word "salubrious" in a context that didn't have anything to do with mountains ;o)

    Joelle: Happy to have discovered your blog!

    1. LOL, Tina-Sue. Every once in a while, I have to throw in a vocabulary word I learned in grammar school. They rattle around in my brain causing mischief otherwise. Thanks for coming by and commenting!

    2. Thanks, Tina-Sue. Yeah, I enjoyed having Patricia visit. She was one of the first people I thought when that reviewer told me she saw only "degradation and violence" in my book. I struggled to step back and think "hm, totally vanilla person who doesn't get it."

  3. Fantastic post, Patricia! A great explanation for those of us with little experience with the DD lifestyle. Of course, since I've read all your books, I feel like I've had some vicarious experience with spankings. :) A wonderful introduction to the genre.

    1. Thanks, Jenna! DD is a subject I rarely get tired of discussing. There are so many facets to it. I'm glad you could drop in and read my article. :)

    2. thanks for stopping by and reading, Jenna. I was glad to give Patricia a spot to talk today :)

  4. Thanks, Joelle, for having me here today. Enjoy your weekend!

    1. you're welcome, Patricia. well as long as I don't get over 100 degrees again, this weekend won't be too bad :D