If there's anything I don't get in DD, most often it's the rules. If you've happened to read earlier posts in this Spanking A to Z challenge, you're sure to have seen me vent about things like rules against swearing. I'm not sure how my opinions might be different if Shaman followed the medium protocol that The Queen does- I've worn His collar so long that I don't think much on what it would be like to have a different dom. I'm always intrigued with DD to see the rules of lists because they are usually much more precise than what I live with, at least at the beginning of a DD relationship or in DD fiction. In many ways, I realize we've settled into a "long term relationship," my Master and I, except He's never been big on specific rules. "Keep my house clean, keep me feed, keep clean underwear in my dresser." Yup, as I cried in my "O is for Organization" post, I need a Simon, the wonderful switch in the Vala's Story story-verse who makes order out of the potential chaos of the large family.
Most "rules" are things I've come up with myself- using some combination of Flylady and just common sense- like the rules for food. To up the protein in a dish if I'm trying to save on the amount of meat, I use minced TVP and make sure there's garlic powder in the dish; Shaman thinks minced TVP is minced garlic lol. Then there's "keep Chinese 5 spice powder on hand"- sprinkling that on a dish helps make a dish "Asian" to Him, which means I can add broccoli without Him complaining too much.
Rules for me flow into ritual. I have to remember that mine look different than BDSM books often, whether they be how-to or fiction books. One rule- "Unless you've eaten recently, you make your food and eat it before mine." While Shaman may have never said exactly those words, that's one of His biggest rules. You see, I have hypoglycemia. While I don't sit at a dangerous blood sugar level constantly, my sugar can nonetheless drop suddenly, whether I've eaten on schedule or not. Sometimes my crashes are tied to my emotions instead of anything I'd label reasonable :D. And yeah, He's had to threaten punishments in the past because I was so attached to some mythical "the Master always eats first," even though it stopped serving our reality not long into our relationship. So one ritual- "Master, are You hungry?" To which He responds, "Have you eaten?" Depending on my response, He might hold out on answering if He's hungry or not, or I might get a "Feed yourself first and then see about food for me."
Another ritual, equally as loose, is how I capitalize or not. While I don't generally call Him Master in front of our teen, otherwise, I still end more sentences than not with "Master" when speaking to Him and not horribly surrounded by "vanillas." Then there's in writing. Yes, I wander between calling Him "my Master" or "Shaman" [His nickname], or even more rarely His first name, Don. Then in pronouns talking about Him, I capitalize the H, anywhere it appears in the sentence. I don't when I'm sharing something He's said though- He doesn't like slashy speak (the Internet thing of typing like O/our to be inclusive of sub and dom types) and He finds dom-types who cap (other than the standard I of course, that being grammatically correct) to be ridiculous, wanna-be's. And in text, I don't bother to cap; it's too much effort really. And you see, none of this is what Master requires- it's a level of respect that I feel good about giving and as long as I don't use slashy speak, I think He kinda enjoys it.
However sometimes I find that I'd like more rituals- like I was preoccupied with the notion awhile after reading Dakota Trace's "Healing Hark" with wanting more ritual. Shaman doesn't even require me to beg or thank Him for my orgasms anymore :( although I can imagine that's quite a burden on the dom so I don't exactly blame Him. The thing is, it seems that any ritual we do have tends to be something we wander into, rather than Master specifically creating the ritual. Sometimes I wish He would do that, but I'm not sure He's interested, if that's even a kink of His. I'm half-tempted to go reading online, but trying not barraging Shaman with the articles (as I did with the maintenance spanking articles as I talked about in "M is for Maintenance (spanking)." The big thing currently, as it's been a few months now, is somehow getting my needs meet even as Shaman's body takes its sweet old time healing from His injured Achilles tendon and the blood clot that formed along with the partial tearing. (Update- I did do this helpful search on the Submissive Guide- http://www.submissiveguide.com/topics/service/rituals-and-routines/ )