Warning

WARNING

This blog will contain...
...profanity, sexually explicit dialog andadult imagery.
If you are under 18 and/or offended by this...
THIS IS NOT THE BLOG YOU ARE LOOKING FOR

Thanks fiona, from "Sir Q and Me" for the warning message that just makes me melt. :)

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

#DungeonCrawl ... traveling and other ways to cum


While this was originally slated for a post in my blog tour for "Out of the Night: Book One" re-release, I decided it was too good not to share, even if it didn't make it into the final draft of post. I was pondering what makes a "sex scene." This of course led me to thinking of Tom, my past dom from whom The Queen was originally based, and of getting ready to go see him.

I wrote this once thinking about getting ready to see him:

bdsm doesn't necessarily mean pain play. For some it does. There's a whole psychological aspect to it. Even if you can't serve 24/7, there's still a chance for some time to serve, to think as a sub. Again, going back to Tom, who was the first inspiration for The Queen, we lived 30 minutes apart and neither of us had vehicles (I later did before he abandoned me and my Master claimed me).

I was living with my parents after having been kicked out/dropped out of college. Friday morning, I woke at 6am and started getting ready. Shaved, and much more than just my legs. Then I started my make up. Tom was very Gothic and thus so was I. White foundation, powder. Putting on my eye make up to please him took an hour. The rest of my make up was quick. Then getting dressed. A few things would go into a backpack (I wouldn't be getting home until Monday). Then I would start the journey to him. First an hour walk to the nearest bus stop that went towards him. Hour bus ride. 10 min walk to the next bus stop. 30 min ride after how long ever of a wait. Then a 10 min walk from the bus stop to the coffeehouse where he lived. Since he was living in a coffeehouse, we didn't much get the chance for play of a level involving toys. But oh how he could dom, the mental play. the talk, the look, the control. He would wait at a table, chatting, and on my stiletto heels, I'd toddle across the coffeehouse to get him a drink, knowing he'd be watching, if only now and again. i always did want more from him, and a few times even got it. but it was enough to whet my appetite so to speak, to make me hungry to see the pleasure in his eyes when i served him well.

This was all having sex to us. No, his cock didn't go into any of my holes. But with his word of permission, I could have orgasmed at any moment.

14 comments:

  1. Enjoyed this Joelle, you are so right too. So much is psychological and there are so many ways to dominate. Oh yes, the look, the tone.

    Hugs
    Roz

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    1. thanks for the comment, Roz :) I think it's possible to miss the psychological aspect of domination, especially when we're looking for the physical details in erotic romance and erotica. Plus, as The Queen said about the article on rattan canes, it also depends on the author. With Vala- and later books where I dip even more freely into other POVs- I also happily include thoughts. I enjoy the psychological aspect of that sort of writing

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  2. Hey, nice and different Joelle. Thanks for sharing this part of yourself.

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  3. Wow! You know as a reader I always wonder what parts of the story might have been a real happening for the author. Especially so with 'Out of the Night' because of the way the story opens up in the beginning.
    This little snippet of where your idea for the Queen came from is wonderful. The expressions of how and why you did your make up, just so...and the lengths of which you had to travel to visit him are shrouded with so many submissive tenancies.
    This was quite a treat, Joelle. Thanks for sharing. :-)

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    1. thanks for the comment, LA. Well I will tell a few things beyond like what I shared in book tour posts, like "how the story came to be." While I've "overdone" doing drugs in the past, when I was a teen, I'm not sure I ever OD'd- I'd certainly not gotten medical treatment for my escapades and sadly, Sean didn't have Daniel's medical abilities. I've never been homeless for more than a few days, here and there, and no, I've never engaged in survival prostitution, although I've known people engaging in it; my prostitution was an easy "I'm a spoiled upper class teen whose huge allowance doesn't cover my drug habit." And while not perfect, thankfully my parents aren't nearly as bad as Mearr's.

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  4. It's amazing what a look, a word, a gesture can do. You know my lifestyle so you know how different this is to me. But I do agree the psychological aspects of a relationship can be as strong as the physical.

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  5. Thank you for sharing this. Those on the outside and those who are new don't understand that our play doesn't always lead up to or sometimes never involves things that are sexual. Yes, what you engaged in was very stimulating for you, but it was stimulation of the brain, which is so important in any play to work regardless of what it is. Wonderful post.

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    1. thanks for the comment, Jolynn. I find my perspective is that too many people and culture as a whole limit in their minds what sexuality is. Of course I'm seeing this in hindsight as a more mature adult (I was only 19 atm shown), this was sex for us.

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  6. At least you got to start doing D/s when you wanted to. I had to wait until nearly and after my early 40's. :P My first husband was so vanilla you could stick him on an ice cream cone.

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    1. Well my story is also balanced by the fact that my virginity was taken by rape when I was 13. I was very lucky to be introduced to BDSM when I was because it helped me to heal from my multiple rape experiences.

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  7. Thank you so much for sharing this, Joelle. Very valuable perspective, as always.

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